Living in the future is almost always fear. The future is “what if.” What if I am late to work? What if I don’t save enough for my daughter’s college? What if I lie to my spouse? What if he/she discovers the lie? What if, what if, what if… It’s incessant and never-ending, and all it does is fuel anxiety, and ultimately anger, when we fruitlessly try to control all outcomes.
Read MoreOf course people are unique and relationships even more unique; what works for one couple might not work for another. Yet, I do believe there are qualities and behaviors which solidify a marriage in ways that withstand the trials and tribulations of life – and in the most important ways are simply not secrets.
Read MoreIn psychological counseling, we look toward natural, behavioral changes to improve mental health. Frequently, the most significant challenge to making behavioral change is simply taking “a” first single step. “A” first single step – in the sense that there are many potential single steps we can take, and the open-ended nature of that truth can be overwhelming, to the point of paralyzing our ability to act.
Read MoreLiving in constant fear is not healthy for our minds, and it is not healthy for our bodies. The old adage is true – face your fears to overcome them. As difficult as it may be, a truly effective way to reduce anxiety is to expose ourselves to what we fear. When we do this, the fear subsides and we feel more agency over our lives.
Read MoreIn counseling we work on self-care, and on addressing negative feelings. We also work on how to better communicate. Clear signals and boundaries between ourselves and other people tend to improve our relationships, and better relationships correlate with positive feelings. You have likely heard the cliché – “Stand up for yourself.” This admonition is actually an excellent piece of advice. Standing up for yourself through assertive communication benefits us in numerous ways – helping reduce anxiety, sadness, and anger. It also improves our relationships.
Read More
